Whether she likes it or not, Schapelle Corby is going to be in prison for a long time. If you don't know who Schapelle Corby is then you're a nutsack who should go here. Then come back.
I propose that we turn a little profit from her while she's locked up, and maybe she can garnish some further support since she's already there and not doing much. She's a total babe, has lots of followers, and is a ticking drama timebomb. Seriously, one mention of 'death', 'prison' or 'gluestick' and she's blubbering like a Japanese research ship.
Which leads to my idea; SCHAPELLEVISION™! Stick some cameras in her cell, occasionally give her stimuli to keep those sweet tears coming, and we've got ourselves a blue-chip programme. Hell, TWENTY YEARS WORTH OF BLUE-CHIP PROGRAMMING. We'll give 5% of profit to the sneaky Indonesian government so they can keep locking up drug smugglers (no I don't think she's innocent), so long as they don't spend it on stuff like terrorist interception, military-coup prevention and sociological improvement to stop the youth of Indonesia from wanting stuff like DRUGS and BOMBS so maybe one day they can stop blaming their fucking problems on pot-toting Queenslanders. FUCK. So back to Schapellevision™...
It'll be cheap to produce and excellent to watch. We'll leave her alone for when she needs to go to the bathroom, but showering will be a naked, no-underthingies ordeal. Cold showers too. Followed by pilates in a kiddie pool filled with baby-oil. And me.
Take my poll. I want to gauge interest before I cockslap the television networks with my idea.
Would you watch Schapellevision?
What? I was too busy lubing up in anticipation
Yes but only if The Shield doesn't run for another few seasons
What was that about a kiddie-pool filled with baby oil?
No. Because I'm a rampaging homosexual
I'll update ya'll here. This is going to happen.